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Dear Caver,

your name has been chosen from amongst thousands to take advantage of our privileged, limited edition offer!!!!!!!!

You can already make an application for the Ogof Cul Bronze Card and obtain the associated benefits and enjoyment that it will bring to you and your family.

What is Ogof Cul?

Ogof Cul is the key to caverns measureless to man lying beneath the South Wales limestone. In only a short space of time, the existing digging team has unearthed extensive passage with excellent potential for further development.

The cave is handily situated on Pant Mawr at GR SN 905147, adjacent to the footpath to Penwyllt. Access is easy for four wheel drive vehicles with ground clearance greater than 9" and comprehensive local facilities are just an easy camel march away in Ystradfellte.

Ogof Cul enjoys fine views to the North, East and South (weather permitting) and is not overlooked by adjacent properties.

The South-Westerly aspect affords an excellent outlook towards the Merthyr Tydfil liquid gas tank.

The area around is mainly laid to lawn.

What’s In It For You?

Predominantly mud (but there are some very nice rocks as well).

n.b. contents may settle between digging trips and the diggers cannot be responsible for the exact nature of the spoil on any given occasion. If the advertised materials are not available the organisers reserve the right to replace them with spoil of at least equivalent vileness and quantity.

The Bronze Card entitles you to attendance at Ogof Cul digs, held at least annually, and to help move spoil up the passage. You cannot be allowed access to the working face in case you accidentally discover new passage, which would make the old digging team terribly upset, pack up and go home sulking.

After 2 years digging at Ogof Cul, you can apply for your Silver Card, entitling both you and your whole family to attend digs.

In addition, you will be permitted to position yourself in one of the more undemanding parts of the dig such as shaft base, or directing the hauling rope, while some other less fortunate individual with only a Bronze Card is sweating his balls off in the crawl with a grossly overloaded digging tray.

When you have dug for not less than 5 years, you can get your Gold Card!

Gold Card status entitles you to not only all the facilities at Ogof Cul, but also unlimited access to the Pant Mawr Master System (when available) and the right to organise digging sessions.

How Do I Apply?

Fill in the application form below and bring it to us at:- Ogof GUI, Pant Mawr, Powys

on any Saturday in summer when there is less than 1/8 cloud cover, settled high pressure and no more than a light wind from the South.

At any other time, wrap your completed form in at least 3 plastic bags and stuff it under a convenient rock by the dig.

Ogof Cul Card Application Form

I am a masochist, I like wallowing in liquid squit and damaging myself with falling rocks.

I have scant regard for my personal Health & Safety and for that matter, my entire family as well.

In fact, I am so stupid, I have nothing better to do at weekends than lie in a wet cave passage 18" high and heave out vast quantities of muck and rubble.

I have forelimbs like

a) a mole
b) an aardvark
c) a JCB
d) none of these

Applicants ticking (d) need not proceed further

I wish to make a donation to the digging fund

a) £5
b) £10
c) £25
d) £100

Applicants ticking (d) earn too much

I want to dig Ogof GUI. Please send me my Bronze Card.

Signed

Address

Tel

Offer not applicable to residents of Hexham, Northumberland, persons with more than 2 X-chromosomes and caravan owners. Applicants may be asked to produce a doctors certificate of non-flatulence.